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I'm taking some time for myself. I'm not going to class today, I'm not doing much of anything. I'm waking up, getting work done, going to work, and going to sleep.
I went to Panera today. I don't usually go to Panera. I would have preferred to go to Starbucks, but I can't go back there because I'm wearing the same clothes that I wore there last night and I wouldn't want any of the Starbucks employees to think I'm weird or something. Assuming they even remember me. They probably don't. I only have 55 cents left on my giftcard anyway.
I went to the library today. I know that wasn't on the list I just laid out for you, but I'm filing it under "getting work done" and forgetting about it. I got Obama's "Audacity of Hope." My mom got if for my as a Christmas gift last year and I returned it. Just the title, "Audacity of Hope," is too much of a glittering generality for me. I almost want to throw up in creative writing-disgust just trying to wrap my mind around the nothing that it is. But now that he's the president-elect and I've heard good things about his writing, I'm going to give it a chance.
I also got "Click." It's about the Internet and what our searches reveal about us. Scary. It seems interesting—at least, to me it does—and I figured I could feature it in a book review for Fisher Ink. We need something to fill up space. We are currently contentless.
I have a broadcast script due tomorrow for my creative message design class. I started on it, but I'm actually afraid to look back on it because it's so terrible. I don't know how to write for the radio. I can write for print media—I'm actually really good at that. But I can't write for the radio or TV or anything like that. I guess I need to learn, and I guess there's no better way to learn than to make many many many mistakes on this assignment.
Speaking of my creative message design class, I saw my professor today in Derby. She was walking down the hallway where I was sitting waiting (wishing—sorry, had to go there) for my study to begin. The first time she passed, I didn't notice until it was too late and we didn't acknowledge each other. But when she came back, I was in a good position to notice. She said hi, I said hi. I'm glad she knows who I am. It's my favorite class, and I'm actually good at it. Plus I like her a lot. She'd be fun to talk to if we could both get past our inability to small-talk. We are awkward people.
I have work in an hour and a half. I'm not sure if I'm excited to go yet. I didn't have work yesterday—Veterans' Day—and I was so glad. Tuesdays are my worst days, and it was amazing to have nothing to do but wander the Short North. But today is Wednesday and I have to work 4-close. I guess some human interaction would do me good today. I don't really know if I'm up for it, but I gotta try.
I'm learning how to use Adobe InDesign. I want to be able to help out the design group of Fisher Ink in putting the magazine together. I have ideas and I like design. Especially when it involves typography. I'm still a bit obsessed with helvetica.
My taste in music is stabilizing. I remember when I would listen to Green Day exclusively. Ugh. I was such a tasteless child. But now I think I've found my taste epitomized in Damien Rice and The Alternate Routes and We The Living and MGMT and James Morrison. Okay, so maybe I'm still trying to find myself in the music, but I'm definitely getting closer. Damien Rice is up there for sure. For sure.
There's an open can of Red Bull that's been sitting next to my desk for weeks. I can only imagine that nast that lies (and, possibly, lives) within that can. I should probably clean my room.
I need to read more. I brought so many books from home and still haven't read any.
My roommate just walked in and I lost my train of thought. Adios.
I want to quit Fisher Ink. Maybe I really don't. Maybe I'm just in one of my sleep deprivation-inspired states of destruction. Those happen way too often.
My grades have been pretty good considering it's still the beginning of the school year. Kind of. I got the high scores on midterms in two of my communication classes—100 percent on both. I bombed the midterm in my advertising and society class. I didn't study, and I really should have. Obviously. We don't get our scores back till Wednesday, but I failed. And by failed, I mean I probably got a C. Which is failing to me.
That was a long paragraph. Or maybe it wasn't. Is it weird that this was my first thought when I went to go start on this paragraph? I think I've been around too many style books. I think I'm too obsessed with style and writing and typography to read into its content. It's all about look to me. I care more about typeface choice than I do about the writing itself. I think I need to get this blog back on some kind of track.
I haven't run in a while. It's too cold outside and I'm afraid of treadmills. The last time I ran on one was a few weeks ago at the RPAC. It wasn't disasterous at all. I actually ran over eight miles—a full hour. But I wanted to die when I got off. And I was sweating buckets. It was disgusting. And you know that feeling when you try to walk when you first get off the treadmill? Like you're moving at ten times the speed you're actually going. I can't even imagine how I look to the people around me as I try to slow myself down as a form of cognitive balance. The world just doesn't make sense when I use treadmills; therefore, I avoid them.
I scheduled for next quarter. I'm taking communication 628 (Contemporary Persuasion Theory), communication 463 (Communication Research...or something along those lines—it's required), classics H222 (Greek Mythology)—gotta get working on those GECs—and economics 515 (History of Economic Development over some specific time period that I'm not sure of). So there it is. Plus I'll be working more hours at Oxley's. I'm beginning to really like working there. The people are cool, the hours are nice and a lot of the time I'm either having a good time or am going insane from being on register too long.
Onto majors—I've decided on them. I'm going to major in strategic communication and economics and minor in professional writing. I planned it out and, if I take four course each quarter, I can graduate on time and still be able to do two or there internships. And I'm definitely going to need internships as a communication major. And as a "professional writer." How fancy is that?
I'm a communication major and I'm going to stay a communication major. Even if I'm worried about my career prospects post-college, even if I might only be doing communication because it's fun and interesting, even if I might be better suited for something else—this is what I like and I'm going to stick to it.
The higher-level courses, which aren't that "high-level" to begin with, aren't tough. There's so little work; it's almost not a real major. But the classes are fun, the professors are cool, and, who knows, maybe I'll use this stuff wherever it is I end up.
I had also told myself I was going to stick to a marketing major. I thought I could do both, but now I'm not so sure. The business students don't seem like my type of people, first of all. Plus, business is a bit too rigorous for me, especially since I'm not convinced I want to end up in business. I can't do the whole 9-to-5, dress-shirt-and-tie thing.
But maybe economics as a second major. I've already got a pretty good start on it, and if I go that route, I might even be able to do some kind of minor. Might.
Obviously, I'm still a very confused student.
 Back in my hometown, you can't get vanilla Coke anywhere.
I don't really know how I developed a sudden addiction to vanilla Coke, especially since it doesn't exist in northeastern Ohio. But I did, and I was determined to find it.
So my friend Jenna and I went on a journey: Expedition Vanilla, let's call it. We drove to different gas stations all over the place, checked out three different Targets, a Walmart, and a corner beverage store. Nothing.
We got so desperate that we actually called the number on the back of a Diet Coke can. Each time I called, I was redirected to my local bottling company and was forced to leave a message on the machine because the line was busy. Who else calls the Cleveland Coke bottling plant? I left my name, number, and a desperate plea for vanilla Coke. They never called me back. (Maybe it's because I said my name was Phineas and feigned a British accent while stifling laughter, but that doesn't mean I wasn't entirely serious.)
But now I'm back at OSU where vanilla Coke is quite bountiful. I can walk right next door to the gas station and pick up a bottle. Except sometimes they run out and I have to wait a few days for the stock to replenish, in which case I usually talk at length with the cashier about how lovely vanilla Coke is.
One time last year where I even tried to get my dorm's hall director to stock the vending machines with vanilla Coke. It always bothered me that the vending machines had, like, six buttons for regular Coke and four buttons for cherry Coke. He said he'd keep my suggestion in mind—it went nowhere. I think I'm still slightly bitter about that.
I've never been so busy before—and I love it! I know if I stopped for just a second, I'd fall asleep from accumulated sleep deprivation, but as long as I keep moving, my spirits stay high (too high too be normal, say I) and my productivity is so far out that it scares me.
Today I have the class I've been looking forward to ever since I found out that blogging is a big part of the course's content: COMM 634, Creative Message Writing. Even though someone in the business college completely bashed my communication major yesterday, I'm still glad I made the switch—although I'll probably be double-majoring in communication and marketing just to cover my bases. Communication is so interesting, and even if the job prospects aren't as good as they are for, say, a finance degree, it's still worth it to me to pursue it.
The professors in the communication department are great. I have Osei Appiah as my professor for both my classes on Mondays and Wednesdays. He's basically Randy Jackson with a PhD. Shaved head, gold necklace, buttoned-up short-sleeved shirt, slick glasses, and the ability to say "dawg" and still sound sane. He also worked at Apple, which made him my favorite person yesterday. I can't wait for Monday to get into the meat of the courses.
Today was my third day working at Oxley's. I was late, but it wasn't my fault. I'm usually very punctual—really!—but for a 6:30 a.m. shift, I have problems with hitting the snooze button a few too many times. But it was all good. I made tuna salad. And bagel sandwiches and salads. I actually really like working at Oxley's, even though I never thought I'd ever want a job in the food business. It's a lot of fun and the people are so easy to get along with. Not to mention the perks: Yesterday I took home all the leftover pastries—three bags worth of danishes, muffins, and scones. Way too many to eat, so I gave some away. It totally made up for the two-hours worth of dishes I had to wash. I really hate the closing shift.
Okay. I need to go get my laundry out of the dryer and get ready to run the Uniprint booth in Mason in a half hour. Adios!
The best part about my apartment is my view. Downtown is such an awesome sight at night. I can see Lincoln Tower from here—in which I lived last year—and I can even see into my old window (with the help of binoculars). Creepy, I know, but my roommate is the one who brought them.
I got up at 5:30 this morning for my first-ever shift at Oxley’s. I was pretty excited to get started, mostly because I was hoping to meet fun people and was eager to have access to campus food without a meal plan. Check and check. All I did today was train, but I had a lot of fun. Had it been busy, I would have been freaking out. I was dying trying to keep straight all the different types of coffee drinks and how to wash the dishes and where to find supplies and how to use the cash register. I’m totally not ready to actually do anything. But if I can remember what goes into a German Chocolate Cake Mocha tomorrow, I think I’ll be fine.
I bought a few posters at the poster sale outside Central Classrooms today. I was so excited that they had an Across the Universe poster. And a Prefontaine poster. And Garden State and Eternal Sunshine and Fight Club! So that makes five new additions to my wall. I really love the Across the Universe poster…and the soundtrack—even though I don’t care for The Beatles.
Classes start tomorrow, and if I were the freshman I used to be, I’d totally be deciding what I was going to wear tomorrow. How lame am I. But I’ve become much less narcisistic with age, or so I’d like to think. The first day of classes is syllabus day. No one’s going to care what you look like for the 10 minutes you’re sitting in class—or any other time for that matter. Assuming people even go to class. Don’t count on it.
I’m super excited for my COMM 634 class, which is Creative Message Writing. I don’t have it till Thursday, but the course information was just posted to Carmen and I found out that we get to design websites and write a blog! That class is so me. Maybe this communication-major switch was a good idea. :-)
Yesterday was move-in day and I gotta say it's a lot more fun when you're not a freshman. My friends and I knew what was going on, and I really had no agenda there, so I could just have fun. I yelled an "O-H" and actually got a response when we were at the Schott taking free refreshments. It was fun.
And today was the involvement fair. As a freshman, I remember milling about the Oval with my suitemates and signing up for everything and taking all the free stuff and food and fliers and everything. But this year I actually worked at two booths, which turned out to be really fun. I also went out and explored with a few friends, but mostly just to get candy and the awesome frozen mochas.
I'm officially a communication major. I called today to make sure my application went through, because I hadn't heard anything from them in two weeks. Sure enough, I'm in and totally set. Go me.
I feel really spoiled when I say this, but I just paid my first bill today. It was an Internet bill. I probably messed up and forgot to sign the check or something. I hope my stamps are still good. Do stamps expire? I swear I've had those forever. I feel really stupid now.
My bike (which is missing a front wheel that someone stole) from last year is STILL locked down outside Lincoln. My former suitemate sent me a pic of it a few hours ago and asked if it was mine. I can't believe they haven't gotten rid of it yet. It's all rusted and probably not even functional.
I start my job at Oxley's tomorrow. I think. I'm still kind of unclear on my schedule. I called today to get it confirmed, but they apparently had no idea either and said they'd either call me back or email. They haven't done either yet and I'm kind of worried. It's going to be so awkward when I show up at Oxley's at 6:30 a.m. tomorrow. "Hey, I'm the new guy. What should I do?" I hope the people there don't suck...
I've been meaning to write for some time now; I was just waiting for inspiration to strike. Unfortunately, I'm still waiting. I thought that maybe looking out at the awesome city view from my apartment would get me in the mood, or running my old 7-mile route into Upper Arlington, or walking back from my friend's at 3 in the morning and passing yet another intense fight at that Taco Bell on High Street right before the Gateway. But nothing.
It's good to be back—I can say that much. I've mostly been staying awake during obscene hours just hanging out with my best friends. I'm spending way too much money and classes haven't even started yet.
Oh! I got a job at Oxley's by the Numbers Café! I thought I started this week, but I went for my 6:30 a.m. shift and it was closed, so I walked over to the dining hall offices and asked what was going on. Apparently the guy gave me the wrong dates when he hired me. Getting up at 6 a.m. for nothing sucks.
I applied to the arts & sciences college last Monday and still haven't heard back yet. But I got into all the classes I want to take for this quarter, so no complaints here. All communication courses, too: 200, 431, 634, 644. They told me I should take an honors course, too, to make sure I keep my honors status, but none were really available…so it looks like I'll just be taking two of them next quarter.
Ummm, what else is there…I bought a bike today! It's a sexy red bike. I got it at Target for $170, which is so much, but it was the cheapest they had that wasn't a children's bike. Plus it's sexy. And with the 90-day return policy, I could always just be shady and return it before winter quarter (assuming it remains in returnable condition) and get all that money back. Because by that time I'm really really really going to need it.
I really want a futon. I think it'd be fun.
Why can’t I do anything without regretting it? I dropped accounting because I thought it wasn’t for me. But what if it is? What if it is, and now I’ll never know. Communication better be for me, because it’s getting kind of late in the game to keep switching up my majors.
I’ve never wanted to be anything in my life. I can’t remember a time when I was younger and wanted to be a fireman or a doctor or even a cashier. Doesn’t every kid want to be something?
I wish I wanted to be a doctor or a lawyer or an accountant. Some kind of job that makes good money. Is it wrong that I think it’s unfair that some people are naturally inclined to those sorts of jobs? But maybe I’m just the kind of person who’s never going to have a steady job, who’s going to change with the times, who’s never going to be rich because the jobs that I like don’t command that kind of money. Or maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’ll find where I fit if I just keep going for a while. I don’t know how long I should give it before I give up.
Yesterday a friend told me that it’s unfortunate that the business college is going to “lose a brilliant mind.” I was so flattered—and kind of sad. Maybe I belong in the business college…maybe just not in accounting. You know? Of course not. I don’t even know. Now I’m just ranting. But, anyway, he said I was driven and one of the most ambitious people he’s ever met. He said he was impressed when he met me. The thing is, I don’t see these qualities in myself. I never have. I want to, but I never have.
I like to be busy. I like to be juggling many different tasks at once. I like deadlines. I don’t like getting to work at a specific time each day. I don’t want a clock to run my life. I like to edit. I like to design. I like the word aesthetic. I have problems with authority. I tell myself what to do. I need to have control over everything—and if I don’t have control, no one better have control. I don’t like to wear ties—unless I can dress it up in a preppy, completely nonbusiness way. I like words and the alphabet and typography. What am I?
I don’t know why I did it or what’s going to happen now that I did. But, finally, I dug up the courage to drop my accounting h211 class, my business management classes, and break ties with the business college to do something that I want to do because I want it—not because I want it to make me money.
Meet the new Mark, a communication major. My dream job would be to work in layout or copy at some kind of magazine—Physology Today, Runner’s World, or The New York Times Magazine top my list. I’ve always liked words, characters, symbols, numbers—maybe that’s how I slipped into my former major, accounting. But it’s more that I like the shapes and styles and presentation of numbers and letters and symbols. I’m a typography geek. I grammar-check road signs and menus at restaurants, I get irritated when I have to use the 10-items-or-less lines at supermarkets, and I have an impressive fascination with type faces and ampersands.
So maybe my first year of college was a waste. But I’ve made appointments with communication advisers and advisers from the Arts & Sciences college so I can transition. I’m going to need to apply to the college, find out about the honors requirements, which classes I need to take, and how to get myself on track.
It was kind of exhilirating to take the leap, to drop those business classes, to tell my current adviser that I’m out. It will be even better to get back on campus and start over. I guess I’m really not starting over; I guess I’ve really always been a communication major. I freelanced for The Lantern and got an article published first quarter, I’m the Content Editor-in-Chief of Fisher Ink, a section editor for The Journal of Undergraduate Research, and have made tentative plans with some friends about starting our own publication this year.
I’ll be back on campus next Sunday. I have appointments the very next day to plan out my life. Oh—and remind me to ask about scholarships. I really need money.
But the best part of all of this is that, ever since I made the switch, I’ve been more open. I’m listening to Jason Mraz. I wouldn’t have been caught dead doing that before.
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