Oh joy, it’s time for finals and what am i doing? definitely not studying…
so, my finals schedule this semester is quite unique. i say unique because i can’t decide if i like it or not.
i have decided to describe it to you in the form of a recipe.
A. because i like food and
B. because i want to

First, on Wednesday begin pre-heating your oven to cram-hundred and sixty-five degrees. Around 6:30pm on Thursday, break open one ACCT-1302 and place it in a large saucepan. Sit and stare at it for 2 hours; then stir rapidly for the final hour. Here I recommend chewing on the handle of the stirring utensil whenever necessary to relieve any tension or nervous energy. At 9 o’clock Thursday night toss the ACCT-1302 mixture into the oven. For best results, dream about ACCT-1302 all Thursday night.

Wake up the next morning and quickly drink one ECON-1311 at 9 am. It’s best if you just swallow, don’t even taste it. Even though it seems really too much to chug, I promise you won’t choke. It is infused with AP (awesome professor) and memorized formulas that guarantee smooth travel down the esophagus. Once you’ve finished ECON-1311 fret for five minutes before franticly remembering the oven should still be cooking at cram-hundred and sixty-five degrees.

Promptly, at 2 o’clock drizzle one tablespoon of MIS-2301 over a bowl of mixed emotion and gently place it in the oven next to ACCT-1302, which should be a nice light shade of forgotten. When placing MIS-2301 into oven remember that this particular serving of MIS-2301 counts for about a quarter of your meal so you need to make sure it is done correctly.

Once ACCT-1302, ECON-1311, and MIS-2301 are finished, let simmer for six days before removing a frozen FILM-1301 from the freezer. Yes, six days of waiting. These hours could perhaps be well spent turning the oven down to calmly-studying and sixty-five degrees, but this step is not necessary. On Thursday…again I must stress six whole days later…I will now hit the spacebar on my keyboard six times to show you really how long you must wait______okay, that’s a terrible example, but you get the idea. At 8:30, take FILM-1301 out of freezer and puncture the film on FILM-1301 to vent before placing dish in the microwave. Cook for three hours, and don’t worry about periodically rotating it because I’m pretty sure by now all microwaves have that amazing little technology that spins the little dish on its own, so we can stop putting “rotate" in the little directions on the back of the little packaging. Suddenly remember that you actually really enjoy FILM-1301, and it – being infused with AP, GC (great class), and VI (very interesting)– usually turns out fairly well.

Finally, once FILM-1301 has finished heating, worry for a total of one minute about all ingredients. Then, turn down the heat, and leave the kitchen until next year. In the mean time, pop open one huge can of winter break and enjoy!

I guess I can say that my schedule is not bad. I actually sort of like the six-day break in the middle. It’s pretty fun being on campus, in the dorms, with no schoolwork to do. Although, I live close enough to San Antonio that I could just go home; then show up on the last day of exams and take my film final.

that is all.
maddi