Sometimes, life gets in the way of college. And there's no way around it. This might sound redundant- isn't college a part of life? Yes, of course it is. But often times, you forget about “real life�- the things that happen outside of the lovely, contained bubble of happiness that is Trinity. So many times I brush off the question, “so what are you going to do when you graduate� with a smile, some sly non-committal answer, and leave it at that. But it’s coming up. Fast. Suddenly, “oh, we’ll see, I’ll have options� or “move to a big city� or “space ranger� doesn’t seem to cut it.

Then there are the days that words can barely express. In the middle of September, my friend Carrie’s grandfather fell very ill. We took her to the airport so she could visit him. A few day later, our friend (and Carrie’s housemate) Melanie’s grandfather died. We went dress shopping for the funeral. That weekend, Carrie’s grandfather passed. The next week, my grandfather in California passed unexpectedly as well. Three very loved and important men gone in three weeks. The randomness of life hit my group of friends in full. Here we are, enjoying life to its fullest, trying our best to get good grades, maybe get some sleep, and then things like this. What do you do? We coped the best way we knew how- receiving the love and support our friends selfless gave, and moving on.

LSAT and GRE testing came and went as well, all at the beginning of October when the above was happening. A entirely new form of stress. I didn’t take either of these tests, because of the little I know of my future path, these will not be required. But other friends did, dealing with the big looming questions- what if I do not do well? What then? Plans can only be made up to a point, and after that, you must trust in your abilities.

Relationships: The people you love the most are the ones you can hurt and who can hurt you the most. Senior year is a very weird time. You look back at the time you have spent here, panic and wish for more, and begin to try and take hold of your life. Often you do this by lashing out at your friends and significant others. I’ve been on both ends of these situations. It is not fun, but it’s part of growing up and coming into your own- claiming what you want and what you deserve. In the end, I like to think the relationship is stronger because of it.

Leadership. You know what you are in for when you take on job, but that doesn’t stop it from being damn hard. I’ve taken on leadership roles all my life, and I wouldn’t change that about myself at all. But sometimes (a lot of the time), I find myself thinking about London. No clubs, no responsibilities. It was pretty nice. It’s difficult to govern your friends and make the best choices. No one likes being the bad guy. But again, you have to believe in your abilities and good judgment and hope all turns out for the best.

This has not been an easy semester for anyone I know, myself absolutely included. But during a *brief* lull in things due (I had my 2 papers, 2 presentations in one day on Monday), I will try and catch you all up on the good things that have happened too. I know this was a bit of a downer post, but I think it is important to here that college is not all rainbows and sunshine. I know I talk about how hectic my schedule could be, how hard writing an insane paper is, but this is the real deal. These are the things we don’t talk about, that make this whole experience at Trinity real. In five years, I won’t remember that one sorority mixer with that random theme- I’ll remember the day my grandpa died, or the day my friend got engaged to the love of her life, or the day I became proud to be an American and a Texan and our country changed history. This is what is real. This is what college is about.

Peace and Love,
Mandy