The following is a Facebook note I wrote a few days ago. I thought it might be suitable for a blog entry as well (I edited it a little bit for clarifying purposes):

"I finally got to see the whole documentary produced by two major media sources from Colombia about the country's last 25 years of history. It was hard for me not feel shaken, angry, depressed, and ashamed. Colombian history is a one of amorphous conflict and unconventional players: a failed state, numerous insurgent groups, drug traffickers, and politicians of all varieties, all battling in a contest for power. The inevitable result of such contest... the loss if innocent lives.

Some of you might have seen my Facebook status ("Sebastian is wondering how is he going to clean up his country's mess if he can't clean the mess in his own room?"), which alludes to my desire of changing my country for better someday. While the images ran through my computer screen, I felt great pressure on my chest, tears pushed against my eyelids and my teeth gritted. Before writing this entry, the fact that these powerful emotions ran through my body by watching the documentary made me realize the strong urge I feel to change the world (I have given myself the luxury of using this childish, foolish cliche, and I apologize). This realization made reminisce to several experiences I've had in my travels to Europe.

Berlin and Auschwitz have seared a mark on my heart and brain. Auschwitz has undoubtedly changed me, since you can still feel the horror from the past looming on the fields. The thousands of lives tortured, exploited, and thrown away in ashes out of the chimneys still scream the injustice committed upon them. During my visit to the Birkenau section of Auschwitz, I couldn't stop thinking about the many victims of kidnapping, trapped in similar camps under the same treatment the Nazis gave to their prisoners in the Colombian jungle. The empathy with the horror and despair of a family being transported to Auschwitz was also the empathy with the soldiers, policemen, and civilians "muriendo en vida" in the jungle.

Berlin has a different story. For me, Berlin is a monument to German history. Every inch of the city whispers a story from the past. From the Neue Wache, to the Reichstag, the Brandenburg Gate to the Berlin TV tower. Every building has a story tell. The Monument to the Murdered Jews draws my attention in a special way, since few are the monuments initiated by the civil society that remind you of their greatest failure rather than their greatest victory. The Wall is a scar to the city's face, that reminds you constantly that there was something wrong in the past. Yet, Berliners got over it, they teared it down. A walk around Zoologischer Garten reveals a vibrant city, ready for change, evolving, moving with the trend. Berlin is living history. It reminds you of the tragedies of the past, while it moves forward. It's constantly evolving, and that's the beauty I see in it. History is in the back in your head, so you may avoid the pitfalls from the past.

And now I come here, to this desk far away from home, pondering about my role in this gargantuan task. I compare the effects of the documentary on me to the combined effect of Auschwitz and Berlin. History is important, it makes you realize how bad things can be, so you can avoid being back at that place. There are many reasons to strive for a better future. There is hope, and hope was something had been numbed out of me during my time in college. The last part of the documentary stressed the many aspects in which Colombia has really improved and the reasons Colombians have to celebrate. No matter how dark the times are, in Colombia there is always a reason to smile and enjoy life.

At this point I forgot what the whole point was of writing this note. I just had to express myself somehow. It might have turned out to be an idealistic piece of crap, but I end on a positive note. I've regained some hope. Hope to fight. And the mess in my room has been cleaned up."

Posted by Sebastian at 6:33 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Two Sundays ago, I headed out on the last week long field trip for my study abroad program. Our destination was Central Europe. In one week we visited Budapest, Krakow, and Prague, and met with different government officials and NGO members to discuss the prospects of the most recently accepted nations into the European Union. On Sunday, we took a bus to Stuttgart, where took a plane to Budapest. The first night was pretty chill, since we got there at 11 pm and barely any restaurants or bars were open. The next morning there were no meetings scheduled, so some of my friends and I decided to go exploring Budapest.

Our first stop was the Gellert Hill, where the Statue of Liberty stands atop. This statue is very different from the one greeting ships arriving to New York. For starters, this statue uses both hands to hold a feather above her head, and it's resting on top of 20 ft tall pedestal. The statue is the only remnant of communist art in the city as well. I would love give a more detailed explanation of what the statue means, why was it placed there, etc., but we didn't have time on our schedule to have a guided tour around the city.

We then headed to the Castle District. The Castle was built during the Hapsburg Empire, and it is breathtaking. The Palace now houses several museums and it is huge. Unfortunately we didn't have much time to walk around because we had to change into our formal attire to go to the Parliament meeting. However, here's a small sample of what I saw.

Later that day, we went to the Hungarian Parliament. It's one of the largest governmental buildings in the world, and certainly the landmark of Budapest. We began our visit with a short guided tour through the premises of the Parliament, but that day we couldn't visit the debating chamber since there was some political unrest. One of the Ministers was being dismissed due to a scandal and the current governing coalition is very likely to collapse. In any case, some rooms were off-limits for us since some meetings were being held to discuss how to approach the situation. The building itself is a monument to the Hungarian pride, due to its grandeur and the fact that it was built with raw materials coming exclusively from Hungary(with the exception of Swedish granite columns).

The building also houses the Holy Crown jewels, items that every king had to wield during their coronation and then return to the Treasury.

After the tour we had a meeting with two parliamentary aides from the European Issues Comission, who discussed the implications of EU accession for Hungary. As a transitioning economy, Hungary has had many challenges in its history. The change to a free-market economy brought many destabilizing economic factors, and overall it is the "poster-child of everything that could've gone wrong" (to quote the lecturer) among the new EU member states. Their most important challenge now is to comply with all the requisites in order to adopt the Euro. They are the only candidate country that does not fulfill any of the criteria, and the current economic environment doesn't yield any optimistic panorama.

After the meeting we had a boat cruise on the Danube River. The tour took place at dusk, so we got a view of the Budapest from both daylight and nighttime. One of the most beautiful experiences ever, accompanied of course by Strauss's Blue Danube.

After that we had a small dinner at nearby pub, and went back to the hotel. The night was not party friendly since it was Monday, all pubs were closed, and we had to wake up at 7 am to go to our next meeting.

The meeting was with an researcher from the American funded NGO Freedom House. This body researches the development of freedom in the former soviet states. Of course, Hungary is part of it. He highlighted many of the challenges of a transitioning economy. It caught my attention when he mentioned that since his branch had the label "Freedom House...Europe", he didn't have a hard time as his colleagues in Turkmenistan, where the organization was directly linked to the US (although both branches are).

Afterwards, we went to the House of Terror.

The name can be misleading, but actually, it isn't. Let me explain myself better. The House of Terror is not a haunted mansion, or anything of that sort. It is the building where the Hungarian Nazi Party had it's headquarters and later the Communist Party. It is now a museum talking about the oppression people were subjected to during the time. Now, the name is not misleading, because the whole exhibit excels at manipulating your psyche to creep you out. There's creepy music in every room, they play with shadows and lights to give everything a creepy look, except for the most shocking part of the building. You take an elevator that descends very slowly into the basement, while a screen shows an interviewee explaining how the people who were against the regime were executed in that very same basement. You get out the elevator, and the basement is basically a small prison. You walk down the prison cells and then you come to the room where all the gallows are. At the end of your visit, you have a very dark display of iron crosses dimly illuminated with red-colored lights. The place pushed the "terror" thing a little bit too much for me.

This part of the trip was a good start on the rest to come, overall. The weather was great and we were there in an interesting political time for Hungary. Coming up, more excitement and some depression, since Krakow, Prague, and Auschwitz were also part of the field trip.

Posted by Sebastian at 7:37 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)