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When I got to class last Friday, I was so tired that I was shaky. The professor had handed out our take-home exam the week before and it needed to be completed by December 19. I really pushed myself last weekend and in the early part of the week to get it done for the 12th. It had seemed like we were not going to be having class on the 19th - which is indeed the case - and I wanted to save myself a drive to Baltimore from DC just to hand in a few pieces of paper.
But I think I may have pushed myself a little to hard in the process. Sitting in class I could really feel that I was 43 and that it was the end of the semester. I was so very done with this thing called being in school. I had hit the wall.
I can't remember when we get grades back for the fall semester, but right now I really don't care. I've done my best and learned a lot about CBT. So far I am passing in my placement and learning a lot there too. And that's all that really matters in the end.
I spent the weekend sleeping in a little bit and bustling about the house addressing the piles of things I couldn't focus on before, getting the tree up, the gifts wrapped, the cards written, the list checked, etc. I'm so glad I got the exam done early. Hopefully this week I will finish "Santa's chores" and still have a few moments, just for me, before the kids are home for Winter Break.
Happy Holidays to all. See you next year.
Kathi
It is hard to believe I have been going to my placement for three months now. The newness has worn off a bit at this point and I'd like to think I can feel my feet under me a little. "Like to think" may be the operative word. You may remember that I am working at a community mental health clinic in Wheaton. While I certainly knew previously that it takes years to really hone one's skills as a therapist, I can see first hand now why this is the case.
I wrote previously about the pace of the work. In the last month my caseload has picked up quite a bit, so I now have fewer slow days. This is definitely working better for me. I do find myself wishing I had learned Spanish last summer as I had originally planned when I accepted this placement. Somehow that just didn't happen. But my co-student from Catholic University, who is bilingual, is a better fit than I for the multicultural population the clinic serves - heavily Latino, with a fair number of African and Vietnamese clients. Most of my clients speak English fluently but the few with limited English skills have thus far chosen to tough it out and not use the translation service. Still, sometimes it is hard to understand the client, which is frustrating for both of us.
So, yes, I have had a chance to try therapy in this placement. Some of the clients have more of a capacity to engage in this process than others. Almost all the cases are complex, consisting of combinations of multiple Axis I diagnoses, Axis II diagnoses (ie. personality disorders) and medical or social issues. Many of the clients have had multiple stays in psychiatric hospitals. In this clinic you can see clearly the effects of the deinstitutionalization of mental health.
So far, the clients I struggle with the most are those diagnosed with schizophrenia who present with significant negative symptoms. I feel like I hear every tick-tock of the clock in these sessions. Most of the time otherwise, though, the hour seems to fly by. I'm rarely certain that I am doing "the right thing" with any one client, but I am learning a lot about myself and the therapeutic process, while doing the best I can. It's a good thing I have another twenty years to "perfect" my technique.
Some people say that the MSW program is a personal growth process as much, if not more, than an educational experience. I do think you start to see the world around you a little differently over the course of the semesters. For some people the shift may be subtle. For others, it may be more dramatic. The characteristics of others that once seemed maybe just a little odd or different certainly take on different meanings after studying the DSM in Psychopathology. Sometimes now there are labels that come to mind in daily interactions. It seems to me that can be both good and bad. I think sometimes the labels can save you a bit of personal grief and can help in approaching more difficult personalities/situations if you heed them.
I am also finding that I see groups differently now, having studied group dynamics some. My Friday morning class has been interesting in this regard. The first day the professor was very up front that the course was demanding, in terms of the volume of reading particularly. It has been interesting to note that we sit in distinct subgroups in this class. At first there were two groups, one at each end of the room, with a large group of empty seats in between. I myself sit in the back right corner with my friend from last year's placement. He chose our seat because he got there first on the first day and I went with it. I have felt very comfortable in my corner, sitting with my friend, with a cluster of classmates sitting in front of and around me.
The past few weeks, the two groups have broken down further into three. There is now a small group on the rightish-center of the room in addition to the right and left groups. Interesting. I've wondered: Do we sit like this in this particular course to manage our anxiety? How conscious or unconscious is this? Is this a common pattern of seating in this course, or is our class weird?
So all this may cause those of you out there who are possible applicants to wonder about the social climate at the School of Social Work. I really can only speak to what happens in and around the classroom because I am just not a part of the rest due to time and logistical constraints. My observations are also, of course, a product of my own experiences. (Read: Take them with a grain of salt.) I have made some friends at the School of Social Work. Some friends I only see in class and others I see "outside" for lunch, dinner, drinks, etc. I will say that the dyads and groups were pretty visible last year at Shady Grove. This makes sense if you think about it. Shady Grove is a group of 40-50 students. The full-time students are together for 12 hours of class a week. The sprinkling of part-time students like myself might shift the group dynamics slightly but unless you choose actively to be a loner, you are probably going to find yourself part of some dyad or group. In Baltimore there are more courses offered, at different times, on different days. There is more mixing, if you will. From what I have seen, this limits the development of groups. Pairs seem to be more common.
I used to think we left middle school behind when we left 8th grade. Now I see we are in middle school all over again, recast in different group names, all our lives -- and the middle school dynamics play themselves out, over and over again.
It's hard to believe it's November. Wow. The last couple of weeks have been crazy, but I don't have much to say that I haven't said before, I guess. For an "alternative-age" student such as myself, it's really about balancing all the little pieces. Recently it's been the first real tests for my third grader in science and social studies, the fifth grader's multiple projects (native american dwelling model, plant poster, book report diorama, etc.), my own midterm exam, Halloween, and future plans for middle school - tossed in with the day-to-day placement, classwork, elementary school homework and kid activities. This week, for some reason, it all seems to have slowed down. I have all this time on my hands. I find my mind drifting towards Christmas....
My class is moving along. I think we are finally reading more of the material most of us expected to focus on when we registered for the class: ie. cognitive behavioral therapy. The first half of the syllabus was all about Behavioral Therapy. Now, post-midterm, we finally hear about the role of cognitions. Sometimes I think this course should be called Behavioral and Cognitive Therapies.
I continue to accumulate clients at my placement, but many of them do not stick around for long even though they really need the services. I'm definitely seeing chronic mental illness up front and personal. It's an education to see the DSM diagnoses manifest, in different ways, in different people.
Well, that's about it until next time -
I continue to plug along with my class. This coming week (Week 8, but who's counting) we have the midterm exam, postponed from last week. At this point, I just want to do it and be done with it. The "bad" news (per Dr. Pecukonis) is that the computer lab was not available for our rescheduled exam, so now we have to write them out by hand. Aw, shucks (see my last blog)....
I thought I would write a bit more about my placement this time. You may recall that I am working at a community mental health clinic. The clients all carry an Axis I diagnosis, most commonly schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, major depression, anxiety, or an eating disorder. The clinic has both psychiatrists and therapists on staff, most of whom speak at least two languages. The clients are predominantly Hispanic or Vietnamese. Because I am not bi- or multi-lingual, the clients with whom I personally am working speak English, with at least a basic degree of facility. I am certainly learning a lot about the Axis I diagnoses and expanding my cultural competence skills. And I'm still working on that learning curve that I wrote about previously in terms of the medications.
But another thing I am learning about in this placement is the pacing of the work. A couple of blogs ago I said the work at this placement did not seem that different from what I did last year at the correctional facility. I no longer feel this way; there is much more depth with each individual now that I have moved beyond the intial sessions with some of them. Also, when I interned at the correctional facility last year, it was go-go-go. Basically I moved about at my placement at much the same pace as I move through my days as a mom. The pace of the work at the clinic this year is quite different. I have more time to just "be" than I have had in at least 10 years. You would think I would leap at this opportunity to slow down a bit. However, I am finding that slowing down requires some adjustments from me. I am just so accustomed to running, running, running. My first blog of this semester is a prime example of what I am talking about.
This placement appeals much more to the introverted side of my personality. This is the piece of me that loved working as law clerk to an appellate judge. I literally spent my days in the library while working in that position. It was very solitary work. There's no library at the clinic, but I've been constructing my own, bringing in all sorts of reading material. I've had the luxury of reading through entire files, word by word. And once again, my days are pretty solitary. Unless I am working with a client, I am pretty much by myself. There is another student (from Catholic University School of Social Work) and we share an office, but we only overlap on Wednesdays. Most of the time I use the office across the hall on these days because we see clients at different times and somebody has to go somewhere else.
I'm not sure how I feel about all this yet. Some days I am ready to fall asleep after a couple of hours. I check my watch a thousand times and wait, with some resignation and impatience, for my appointed time to leave. I am very aware of meeting my hourly requirements for the field placement office. Other days, though, I am lost in my reading, pursuing various tangents at whim and enjoying the opportunity to do so, at least part of the time. I sense that I am gradually slowing down, just a little bit, all around. When I leave my internship of late, I am not quite as compelled to run in ten directions at the same time in the name of being a "good mother."
So far I remain on the fence about whether I have the ability to become a decent therapist. This is one of the main questions I wanted to answer through my advanced placement. I want to know what kind of job I should be looking for once I graduate (hopefully, anyway) in May. It seems the ability to cope with a slower pace is a more important part of the puzzle than I had previously imagined.
Week 6. Not that I am counting. Well, ok, yes I am. I think I have "senioritis." I am definitely moving through the weeks with one eye focused upon finishing this program in the Spring. It has been quite a ride, being back in school at this point in my life. I've learned a lot but it will be nice for my family to be able to settle into a predictable schedule. I think the upheavals every few months are starting to wear on everyone.
But I am jumping way ahead of myself.....
My class is coming along. We have a midterm exam in a week (or so) in the computer room. Yes, dinosaur-me will be typing a 3 hour exam. I imagine it is much easier for the professors, who then do not have to decipher handwriting. But I do still feel some trepidation. For me, it is a somewhat novel way to take an exam. Heaven forbid (KNOCK ON WOOD) a computer snaffoo in the final minutes of the exam! And yet, as we all know, that possibility does exist. If I had my druthers, I think I would still go with a handwritten exam with tangible work product, on paper, from the start. Yes, a conservative approach, but it's a long 3 hours.
There is a lot of small group work in my class. I think I wrote a prior blog about how much group work there is in social work school. A couple of years ago, it felt really weird to be in these groups. Now it feels pretty normal. Our group is doing ok in the sense that there doesn't seem to be any one person who is taking over, squelching the input of everyone else. But we could use a leader. I have seen this before in this program. Often the leader in a group emerges by default. Unlike law school, where my colleagues vied for the reins, I find that my social work peers for the most part (myself included!) are not as interested in being leaders. It's noteworthy because as social workers we consider ourselves to be agents of change. It would seem that change requires leadership.
At my placement, I am seeing the DSM Axis 1 diagnoses up close and personal. I have a bit of a learning curve on the psychotropic medications prescribed by the psychiatrists in the clinic. I am working on this, trying to understand how the medications each of my clients is taking play a role in the treatment plan. There is some case management, but also the opportunity to try psychotherapy. This is what I wanted. I need to figure out if the clinical piece, in the narrow sense, is for me. Stay tuned.
So, we are back in the full swing of things now. We are beginning Week 4, already. Yes, that is hard to believe but true. I look back and am amazed that I have thus far been able to keep up in my class. I just have not managed yet this semester to carve out a distinct time to do my reading and writing for this class. Every week there is a different reason for this, but I read a little here, a little there - in the car waiting for the kids to be dismissed from school, at the pool waiting for one kid to finish practicing, in the waiting room at the doctor, in the kitchen while waiting for something on the stovetop, etc. Somehow the little snippets of time add up and the reading gets done. But I really need to carve out this time, just for my sanity, because there is a significant amount of reading in this course. And it's pretty dense so far.
Things are moving along at my placement too. I'm gradually receiving clients, which is a good thing because it enables me to get a grip on the files one by one. "Grip," of course, is a relative term. I don't mean to imply that I really have a clue what I am doing. But some sense of the client history, presentation and the like is certainly helpful. So far it does not feel all that different from the work I did last year at the correctional facility. Maybe I was more "therapist-like" there than I realized. Or, possibly, I am not "therapist-like" enough where I am now at the clinic. Mmmm. Perhaps a question for supervision......
Hello everyone!
I hope you had a good summer.
I don't know how many of you have been following this blog for the past couple of years, so I will summarize. I'm a 43 year old mother of two who is attempting to complete this program in 3 years. I live in Rockville, just north of DC. My approach to the program of study has been a little unorthodox. The first year I took three courses a semester, loading up on the academic work. Half of these classes were in Baltimore and half were at Shady Grove. The second year I did my foundation placement at a correctional facility in Rockville and took all my courses at Shady Grove. I also took one summer course each year, in the intensive format. I find myself now in the third (and hopefully final!) year, with one course to take each semester plus my advanced placement. My course this semester is Cognitive-Behavior Therapies. My advanced placement is at a community mental health clinic in Wheaton.
We haven't started field so I don't have much to say about that yet, but the class has sure started off with a bang. There were complications already.....
My class meets in Baltimore on Fridays, 9-12. My kids have a 12:30 dismissal on Fridays and will go to the school aftercare program until I am able to pick them up. The complication on my first day was that the 8yo's Brownie Troop scheduled a picnic afterschool. Of course, she wanted to go. Remember, I live in Rockville. Initially I thought it was going to be ok for a couple of reasons. First, my husband insisted earlier in the week that he was going to take a vacation day. Great. Dad could pick up the kids and tolerate a few minutes at the "chickfest" known as Brownies. And I would relieve him at the picnic asap. But, unfortunately, we have been having phone and computer (DSL line) issues during the past month. Dear old dad was working on something Thursday evening and lost his document. Suddenly dad was no longer taking the planned vacation day. Write him out of the picture.
But, still, I do not panic. I reason that the odds of getting out of class substantially early on the first day are fairly high. This has been the case at least 90% of the time in the past. I explain this to my disappointed, tearful daughter at the breakfast table Friday morning, as I am racing around the kitchen making the lunches, fixing hair, checking uniforms, etc. I tell her I will probably make it to carpool and to relax.
However, I think you can probably guess things did not quite play out as I had hoped or suggested to my daughter. I made the necessary arrangements with the school for the kids to go to after care, not carpool, during the class break. I watched the clock during the last half of class, waiting. We were dismissed 15 minutes early. However, the syllabus we received in class called for ten "thought papers" which are based upon the readings. The first paper is due next week. Four of the six books for the readings are on reserve in the library in Baltimore.
So, yes, the image of my crying daughter pasted in my mind, I raced to the library and started furiously copying. In the moment, I was thinking about gas prices and time limitations; special trips to Baltimore for reserve reading seemed out of reach for me. I left the library at 12:30pm. The rest, until 1:15pm, is a blur of running through the streets of Baltimore and driving, quite recklessly and well in excess of the speed limit whenever possible, down through the garage, down 95, and across the top of the DC Beltway. My guardian angel must have been watching out for me. I arrived at the school to get the kids and they were not in their typical place. I literally ran a lap halfway around the building to locate them. At which point my 8yo -- the very child who had been so distraught about this #%&@* picnic at breakfast -- greeted me with a cheery "Hi, Mom!" and proceeded to SIT IN PLACE. I was happy to see that she was not crying because she was at aftercare, not the picnic, but she was NOT MOVING. I signed the girls out, trying to catch my breath, motioning, and telling them to get their gear together. And still, the 8yo just sat there.
At this point I was trying not to completely lose it but I had entered the zone you other mothers out there might also know something about. I had not eaten since 5:30am, but I was not hungry or thirsty. I was not aware that I was exhausted. The adrenaline was pumping. I was not capable of reasoning that I was going to way too much trouble for a picnic that no longer seemed to be so important to my daughter. I grabbed said child's backpack and started racing for the car, telling her "let's go, let's go, let's go." Her 10yo sister was lagging so, yes, I took her backpack and put in on the other shoulder. It is a wonder I did not have a heart attack.
We pulled up at the picnic at 1:24pm. I suddenly realized that I was soaked in sweat even though I had spent the better part of the last hour in an air conditioned car. The 8yo ran happily off to be with her pals. I noticed the 10yo was looking a bit peaked. She had mentioned in the car that she had trouble eating her lunch. I could see a migraine coming on. As we walked in, another mom greeted me and I was drawn into my other world -- the mommy world. I stood with several other mothers watching the kids play and shaking a little bit. I tried to focus on the conversation around me and inquire about how all the kids were adjusting to school, but I felt like I was under water. It was a little surreal. I signed up to help with the apple picking trip in a couple of weeks and to provide the snack for the April meeting. Baltimore and the reserve reading in the library seemed like another universe.....
Yes, we are back. We are definitely back. The race is on.
So here we are. The last day of the semester. As I type, commencement is underway.
In many ways it is hard to believe, but my body says, yes, it's true. I'm physically ready for a break. This week I have been pushing to do the reading for my summer course next week - Advanced Groups. I'm making steady progress and plan to be ready to go on Monday, but my energy level is definitely sagging a bit. I don't quite have the drive I had several months ago. I'm looking forward to settling in with the books I set aside over the course of the year - tangents I had to temporarily abandon so I could focus on what HAD to be done first. Just one more hurdle. So close....
I hope all of you have a rejuvenating summer. See you in the fall in Baltimore!
Well, down to the last real week of the semester. One exam left, and I am procrastinating today. You would think I would just study and be done with it. But no. It's far too tempting to goof off a bit. The preparation for my summer course also awaits, just around the corner - 2 textbooks, some handouts, and 4 movies by May 19th. Ahhhhhh...
The last couple of weeks are a blur. I really don't remember much of it. Mostly just snippets of conversations, random visual points. Too much to take in and absorb.
Field ended. It was so weird not to go to the correctional facility last week. I was completely confused about what day it was much of the week, particularly since the kids had a professional day on Monday. All of a sudden it was Friday, but I really was not sure I had lived through Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. I'm going to miss my placement.
Since I gave you lots of mom stuff last time, and that still dominates my radar screen, I'll spare you and sign off. Good luck to everyone on the last papers and exams!
Whew. Running, and running and running and running.... As my courses heat up for the big end-of-the-semester flourish, the kid stuff is mounting. My head is swirling with little details; in the process I am barely keeping up with larger, more obvious stuff. Yesterday my older daughter turned 10 and we had the day-long gig. A few small gifts in the morning, such as an umbrella - because "Mom, (tearfully and angrily) "I'm NOT carrying a"baby" aka Little Pony umbrella any more!" Things seemed to be going well. For the party we invited some friends to have pizza with her at a restaurant. We had the kids sit by themselves and order on their own, while we kept general tabs from several tables away. But I nearly forgot to get the cake! I mean really! I got the invitations out, fielded the calls, put the little "goody bag" together, etc. The cake was kinda obvious, don't you think? Then we realize this morning (because kid birthdays in this day and age are so overdone) that I do not have the requisite cupcakes for her to bring to school today. Needless to say we made a stop on the way to school for cupcakes.
I find myself wondering what other large details I am similarly in danger of forgetting. Let's see. A doctor's appointment at 2 today for one kid to complete a summer camp physical form due by the end of the month, necessitating notes to the teachers - one kid to be picked up early, the other to go to aftercare for a late pick-up after the appointment. (Check.) An international "fest" at the Girl Scout meeting on Thursday that requires a "novel" food from the chosen Country (at least we did fairly well here - my daughter chose Italy). (Check.) Oh, and drinks because we are assigned to bring snack for the next meeting. (Mission not accomplished. Daughter said we would bring "pink lemonade," which we have yet to find in juice box form.) A memorial service at 1pm on Friday- right in between my two classes - for the husband of one of my younger daughter's teachers - dead at 51 from cancer. (Schedule will need to be juggled. I'll have to leave one class early and probably will be late for the other. Do I have something to wear?) Supplies apparently needed for a "campout/overnight" on Sunday into Monday (my 2nd grader will come home after the bedtime s'mores - she's never had a sleep-over before - the woods is not the place to start!) but there's a substantial list and I need to figure out what applies/what she needs. (Not Checked.) Health form for me that needs to be obtained when picking up at the Brownie meeting on Tuesday, since apparently I am now going to be spending the Sunday in the woods with the girls. (Not Checked.) An orientation for the summer camp on Saturday, which seems way too far away to even contemplate, but in reality is only 6 weeks away.....Oh, and then there's the paper due in Practice on Wednesday. The 6th, and thankfully final, paper due next week in Practice. The paper for Psychopathology. And First Communion. Oh. and the exam in Paradigms next week....And...
So, here we are with six weeks to go in the semester. Just three more weeks of field. Down to the nitty gritty. It really is hard to believe.
The dust is beginning to settle a bit. I have been fortunate to get my advanced placement lined up. It feels good to have this large piece of next year's schedule in place. I'm going to be working at an outpatient mental health clinic for adults Tu, Wed, Thurs. The population served is diverse and low income. I think it will be quite challenging but should expand upon some of the issues I have encountered at the correctional facility in my foundation placement. Most notably, I suspect I will have some female clients! I have to work one evening, something I had definitely hoped to avoid. But one night is better than two. My family managed when I was gone two evenings a week this year, so I'm thinking we will find a way to make one night work next year. At least, that's what I certainly hope.
My class schedule seems to be in order as well, which is weird to say. This is the first time in the program that I have been in a place where I knew what I was doing this early on. In the past I have had some difficulty obtaining the classes I needed and was eligible to take, at times that worked for my family. I'm sure many of you got up early last Wednesday to register just like I did. Gotta love those last few minutes watching the computer clock, waiting for the 6:00 whistle. It certainly was a little unnerving to find no way to register initially for Summer classes, particularly since the Dean had indicated that the system is designed so that you cannot register for any Summer classes if you have already registered for Fall classes. I hesitated, but then decided I could not potentially mess up all of next Fall by waiting. I resigned myself to the concept of two classes next Fall in Baltimore. Frankly, it made me feel vaguely ill, even though the classes themselves were appealing. It seemed like a lot given the distance, my family responsibilities, and the 3-day placement. My head swirled with options and schedules as I got one kid ready and off to school and checked on the other who was home sick with the stomach bug, again (day 2). This is not the first time I have felt this way, I told myself. Somehow it will be ok. One thing I have definitely learned, through past registration experiences in this program, is that, with persistence, things can change and sometimes those changes can make a significant difference in your sanity.
How amazing it was to discover a couple of hours later that Summer was available, that classes still had openings, AND, even though I had already registered for Fall, the system would allow me to register for Summer after all! I don't think I touched the ground again until sometime in the early afternoon. I have one intensive Summer course and then one methods course in the Fall on Friday mornings. I feel like a millionaire.
But I digress. Back to the reality of THIS semester.
My Friday classes - Paradigms and Psychopathology - are quite a pair. Paradigms is really deep. Yes, deep. Maybe I'm just a bit tired by week's end, particularly after working until 8 or 9 the night before, running home to do family stuff, getting to bed late, and then up again early to get the kids off to school. I feel a little bit slow (as it stupid) in this class. More than once I have left class slightly on the verge of tears, very much needing the lunch hour to get it together. But when I think about the material I realize I am learning alot. There's a significant paper due in this class on Friday. I'm feeling a bit intimidated by it and have been chipping away at the research and writing. I hope to feel good about what I hand in.
Psychopathology is wonderfully connecting. Yes, connecting. It just seems to be putting things from my placement, Paradigms, maybe Practice a bit, prior classes, things I have read on my own, and things from my own life experience together. It's shifting the pieces around a bit in my head, so I see some of those pieces a little differently now. And I think that's a good thing. It's giving me different perspectives.
Practice is sort of killing me, to be honest. We are in the last ten weeks and my section has Communities and Organizations. We did the Agency Analysis first, in two paper chunks. We are now doing the Communities portion. I first heard about this part of the course back in the Fall a year ago and have been steeling myself for a group project that needed to be done on a dime. It was quite a relief to learn, last Wednesday, that the four, 4-5 page Communities papers, due one-by-one each of the remaining weeks in April, are to be done individually. I'm SOOO very thankful for this. And while I don't think I would go out of my way to read many of the assigned articles on my own (And how about that "system" for obtaining the articles - one word - "absurd"), I have to say some of them have been surprisingly interesting. Still what is really pushing me over the edge in this class is the living week-to-week part. Working ahead has been my mainstay of survival in this program. But there is no way to do this in these 10 weeks of the course. This instructor is really teaching me a lesson in "taking it as it comes." She lectures in class, and then we have to use the assigned readings and lecture to write the paper due the next week. I have two kids and things change with them minute to minute - my day is not always what I plan or would like it to be. It is hard, for me, to stay on the instructor's week-to-week program.
So I think that may be enough for now. Time to get back to those papers. I hope everyone else is doing well as we slide towards the last month.
Kathi
Registration time, that is. I really hate registration. It all works out, but I hate the process. I only need three more classes, plus my Advanced Placement, to graduate -- assuming I complete everything I am taking this semester. Schedules for the Fall and Summer came out just before spring break. I'm sure many of my classmates have also spent a fair amount of time studying the offerings in the same way I have. I just find it quite complicated between family obligations, placement obligations, and travel obligations (everything I have left to take is only offered in Baltimore). I need to be careful about what I commit myself to. And it can be difficult to get into classes at the "right" times. Thankfully, I have only one more requirement to fulfill, so the rest are at least electives. But this really stresses me out.
We're heading down the home stretch. I can see the end in sight, but it's a good distance away. I have 5 papers left in one class (smaller ones, but FIVE deadlines), a large paper and test in the second class, and a paper plus exam in the third class. My placement is going to end in about a month, which should help with that last crunch, particularly with study time for the tests.
I'm having trouble getting motivated, though. Anybody else feel this way? 'Could be the better weather you can almost taste - summer dreams? 'Could be exhaustion -- things were a little too crazy there in February between my classes, my current placement, my family (the summer camp dilemmas, the illnesses, Valentine's Day, etc, etc, etc.), the ADHD group at the jail, and interviews for next year's placement. 'Could be low mood. I slept whenever possible over break and recovered from the flu/cold thing I dragged myself around with during the last week. Kids were home most of my break (plus this week too), which is a change in routines but never "a vacation."
I need to gear up, I realize, for the next 7 weeks. Somehow just putting those words on paper is not doing the trick.
Come on March 14. I am soooo looking forward to Spring Break. I need a break. Make that I REALLY need a break. I'm fried. Two more papers and an exam to go....
Not much to report because mostly I am plugging away at my placement and on my classes. We've been pretty busy on the weekends with Girl Scout Cookie deliveries and family obligations so I've been under pressure to do my school work on Mondays and Tues/Thurs mornings mostly. My husband asked me this morning, "So what are you going to do today? Just some school work?" Like there were any other options! (Well, I suppose there are actually, but none if I want to get my assignments completed on time!)
The third module of Practice is in full swing - I have Communities and Organizations in these last 10 weeks. Honestly, I can't say I was super enthused about this part of the course, but it's better than I thought it would be. Thinking about my placement as the professor speaks helps bring what could be fairly dry material to life a bit. Six papers - not big papers - but six papers nonetheless. Thankfully, we just got the printer back from the repair shop.
Here we are at another ending of sorts. Yesterday I finished the second module of Practice dealing with Groups with an exam. I haven't had any tests since a year ago Fall Semester, so it was hard to get back in the groove with the test prep. Lots of distractions from possible studying over the weekend with playdates, a hunt for a new winter coat for one of the kids due to broken zipper on the existing one, and other various family oriented commitments. I have at least three more tests this semester, smattered among my courses, and I'm not excited. I'd much rather write a paper.
Speaking of papers, I submitted the first major paper of the semester in one of my classes last week. It felt good to get some points up on the scoreboard by getting something really done and out of the way. It was a push to get this paper (for Paradigms) done because we only had 2 weeks, and I had one kid sick with walking pneumonia during the first week. Needless to say it was a bit nutty. But it's over. Whew.
Also finished the sixth and final week of the group at my placement on Saturday. Again, a sigh of relief. You may remember this was a psychoeducational group dealing with ADHD. In addition to educating the inmates in our group about this condition, we worked on viewing ADHD characteristics as positive and on life skills for areas like relationships and careers. It was really interesting. Definitely a lot of work in terms of developing the curriculum but I feel really fortunate to have had this group experience during my foundation placement.
I'm focused on the next stretch leading up to Spring Break. The kids' Girl Scout Cookies roll in this weekend and will need to be delivered -- the worst part! So hard to catch everyone home and obtain payment....and the weather does not seem to be cooperating at all!!! So much to do, so little time....
The semester is fully underway now. A new rhythm is starting to develop in the household. I love my classes -- so happy with the content and my professors. And, yes, I can see the first crunch ahead around Valentine's day: a paper, a test, and the last day of the group at my placement - all within a matter of days. I'm really glad my Field Application is done, so I can just focus on my placement, classes and family.
The group that a fellow student and I have been co-facilitating at our placement has been a wonderful experience. Since it's a pilot group, we have been developing our own curriculum. Yes, it's been alot of work, too. But we have learned quite a bit about both the diagnosis of ADHD and group work. I feel really fortunate that my field supervisor gave us the opportunity to do this group.
Even though there is quite a bit going on outside the home, I've been distracted by family events. First of all, we have the tween sensation, the Hannah Montana 3D movie this weekend. Who could miss THAT. 'Should be a real scream, according to The Washington Post. I hope everyone is healthy -- we have had some difficulty in that realm this past week.
But the larger distraction has been the hamsters. The kids each got one for Christmas and one was pregnant, so we have a litter of 9, well 7 now -- 2 did not make it. : ( The girls greeted me at the door as I came home from my placement one night yelling, "Mommy, mommy, red things came out of Brittany's butt." My husband added dryly: "Congratulations, Grandma." He never was fully on board with the hamster thing.... Anyway, we thought we had two females; they were together in the cage at the store with several others. My girls did not want "boy hamsters" - "Yuck, Mom!" We've kept the two hamsters in separate cages since we got them, with the exception of the first 15 minutes while we were setting up their new homes. We had debated in the store having them "live together," but quickly realized we had made the right decision to separate them (originally to prevent them from getting "too stressed out") because they did not get along. Brittany, aka mama hamster, actually bit Millicent on the face in the course of things. I did read in the hamster manual that if the female is not in the mood she can be quite nasty to a male who makes a move on her. Since Brittany has actually proved to be the friendlier of the two (Millicent bites if you try to touch her at all), we have wondered whether Millicent is, in fact, a he-she. My older daughter is horrified at this prospect and refuses to accept the possibility. Although this whole thing was not planned, it's been a nice little biology lesson for my girls, who will turn ages 8 and 10 this spring. They've watched Brittany nurse and care for her babies round the clock. Pretty quickly (which is a good thing in kid-time) the babies have sprouted hair, opened their eyes, and started moving around the cage. Apparently we need to get rid of them soon because we do not know if we have boys/girls and they are sexually mature by 7 weeks.... Anybody want a free hamster?
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